Navigating Life

In one week Aaron and I will be on a plane, finally on our way towards a grand adventure- working and living on a dragon fruit farm in Maui. Seven days left of anticipation, three days left until we’re totally moved out of our West Seattle apartment. The torturous ‘limbo’ feeling has definitely subsided as we get closer to our departure. Days are now limited and there’s no time for dilly-dallying. These last couple months we’ve been leisurely packing and debating on what to keep or let go, while spending quality time with our friends and family every chance we get. Overall, this has been liberating, yet an emotionally exhausting experience.   W e bought a one-way ticket to Maui, and we really have no set plan to come back to Seattle. We have good jobs to come home to next April, but we just don’t   know what we will want to do. This uncertainty might be the most frustrating concept for some of our family and friends, and it’s frustrating to try and explain t...

Tossing and turning, no position seems comfortable. My neck and head begin to hurt and my mind begins to wander. The wind is light tonight, which is wonderful compared to the usual excruciating cold that blows through our windows and sliding doors here at the beach apartment. I can hear the waves from our bedroom- and oh how I wish they could wash over my brain and ease all it's neurological firings. Useless thoughts…then poignant thoughts. “Oh, you better remember that Jana.” So I make my way upstairs to the cold leather couch, and I sit wrapped in my blanket and begin to type on my laptop. Recently, I can’t get back to sleep unless I write out (or type out) my thoughts. The sky and sea is a dark mass, blending together as I gaze out the window. I watch the boat lights move steadily against the black backdrop. I have no idea what I’ll be feeling when we are sleeping in a tent or hut in Maui. Will there be bugs everywhere? Will wild noises keep me up rath...